Me: Hey, Uncle Eddy! Thought I’d ring you up and see what you’re thinking about all the impeachment talk – and that pesky Bobby Mueller the Special Counselor who’s poking around.
Uncle Eddy: Charlie, I just got calm down about it – and now you gone and stirred me up.
Me: So what do you think?
Uncle Eddy: I got to tell you, it’s damn straight about time. I voted for them guys. Bought all that crap they were spouting about jobs and money and good times for middle America. Bull crap! Ain’t none of it happening, is there? But all them fat cats cover up each other’s ass.
Me: So you think there’s something there?
Uncle Eddy: I’m thinking someone with balls ought to start poking around. Government law is government law and ain’t nobody should be thinking they can make up their own like some kid’s play time, you know?
Me: You think that applies to the President, too?
Uncle Eddy: Crap! Double crap!! That applies to everybody. Look here, kid. You know I was in Korea. Wasn’t no damn volunteer — I was drafted. I didn’t want to go, cause you heard my older brother Stevie was killed at Normandy, and I ain’t no damned hero. But I went. Didn’t matter I didn’t want to fight no damn Koreans, I went cause the law said I had to.
Me: My Dad said you had a rough time, Ed.
Uncle Eddy: Damned right I did. Froze my ass for two years, getting shot at, sleeping in mud, seeing my pals blown to hell away. Wasn’t no fun – but I followed them rules, damn it. Guys in the Army don’t get no chance to make the rules they wants, they do what they’s told to do.
Me: And the Chinese and the Russians?
Uncle Eddy: They was the enemy, kid — shot at me, I shot at them. And let me tell you something important – if I had ever walked over to them China guys to talk, the Army would have straight away shot me. That was the law. But now the big dogs is talking with them Russians who ain’t our pals any more than they was back then. But nobody gives ‘em a slap on the ass, they just cover each other’s asses. But it’s against the law, kid, against all them laws I know of. So if nothing else, maybe this Mueller guy can dig up all that under-the-table crap and stick it out there so the Congress guys gotta do something. If 18-year old soldiers got to follow the law, so does everybody else. You got me?
Me: I got it, Ed. Let’s hope things get cleaned up.